IFS Therapy in Boston, MA for Daughters of Immigrants
Feel at ease in your body, trust your emotions, and know how to support yourself from the inside out.
Do your emotions ever feel too big, too fast, or too confusing — and you’re not sure what to do with them?
For a lot of daughters of immigrants, this feeling is familiar.
You grew up in a home where emotions weren’t welcomed — they were minimized, corrected, or ignored. You were taught to stay strong, be grateful, and keep going… no matter what was happening inside of you.
So now, when a wave of emotion hits, it makes sense that your first instinct is to push it down, explain it away, or get mad at yourself for even feeling it.
Because no one taught you how to slow down.
No one asked, “What’s coming up for you right now?”
And no one modeled what it feels like to be cared for during big emotions.
So when your chest tightens, your stomach drops, or your thoughts start spiraling, you go straight into survival mode. And the part of you that learned to stay small, polite, and perfect jumps in.
You might notice parts of you that:
compare yourself to everyone — even when you’re excelling
worry constantly about disappointing your family
replay conversations, wondering if you said the wrong thing
feel guilty for wanting independence or privacy
shrink yourself around people who don’t “get” your background
carry pressure to succeed so your family’s sacrifices weren’t “for nothing”
feel like you don’t belong — at work, at home, or even inside your own body
And underneath all of that?
A quiet, private fear you rarely say out loud:
“Why am I like this? What’s wrong with me?”
Nothing is wrong with you.
You’ve just been carrying emotional weight that no one ever taught you how to hold.
IFS helps you finally understand what’s happening inside — in a way that feels compassionate, grounding, and culturally familiar. You don’t have to keep bracing yourself against your own emotions. You can learn how to meet them with curiosity and care… maybe for the first time in your life.
Helping you build an inner world that feels calm, steady, and truly on your side.
IFS gives you something most daughters of immigrants never had: a way to understand your emotions without feeling like you have to “push through” them or “fix yourself” to be acceptable.
Instead of bracing against your feelings or getting frustrated for being overwhelmed, we slow things down together. We notice what’s happening in your body — the tight chest, the sinking stomach, the racing thoughts — and we identify which part of you is speaking. Often, it’s the parts shaped by external expectations: family pressure, cultural roles, community standards, or years of needing to perform strength, success, or emotional control.
I’ll guide you step-by-step in meeting these parts with compassion, not judgment. Using metaphors that feel familiar — like a team, a roundtable, or a board you’re leading — the work becomes clear and accessible. And slowly, things begin to shift.
Your self-critical part softens.
Your guilt eases.
Your body feels less tight.
And you begin to hear your own voice again
Not the one shaped by pressure or survival, but the one that actually knows what you need.
Clients often tell me IFS feels grounding and surprisingly comforting, like finally understanding a language they’ve been speaking their whole lives without realizing it. It becomes something you can turn to anytime — a way to support yourself instead of spiraling, pushing through, or shutting down.
This is the heart of our work: helping you feel at home inside yourself — steady, compassionate, and able to care for your emotions with confidence.
Therapy with IFS can help you feel more rooted in yourself — and less ruled by pressure, guilt, or self-criticism.
As you learn to understand your parts with compassion, your inner world starts to feel clearer and more manageable. Instead of reacting from overwhelm or old survival patterns, you’ll have the tools to respond to yourself with confidence and care.
IFS therapy can help you:
soften your self-critical part and understand where it comes from
ease the guilt that shows up around family, culture, and expectations
feel more grounded in your body, even during big emotions
quiet the constant pressure to perform or “get it right”
build a kinder, steadier relationship with your inner world
hear your true voice — separate from fear, comparison, or obligation
navigate family dynamics with more clarity and less emotional reactivity
set boundaries without feeling like you’re betraying anyone
feel more confident speaking up at work or in relationships
reconnect with parts of yourself you’ve pushed aside to keep others comfortable
move through the day with more ease, presence, and internal safety
Frequently Asked Questions
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Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a therapy model that helps you understand and care for the different “parts” of yourself — like the self-critical part, the overwhelmed part, the perfectionist part, or the good-daughter part. Instead of trying to push your feelings away or “fix” yourself, IFS helps you slow down, understand what each part is trying to protect, and respond with compassion. It’s grounding, empowering, and especially helpful when your internal world feels confusing or divided.
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Many people turn to IFS because they feel emotionally stuck — like something is happening inside, but they can’t make sense of it. IFS gives you a clear framework for understanding what’s going on beneath the surface. We learn which part is speaking, why it shows up, and what it needs to calm down. Over time, you’ll feel more clarity, more control, and more ease — especially in moments that used to feel overwhelming.
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They’re related, but not the same. Some parts in IFS may feel young or hold childhood experiences, but parts work goes far beyond the “inner child.” You may also have parts shaped by cultural expectations, family roles, achievement pressure, identity conflicts, or perfectionism. IFS isn’t about labeling you — it’s about helping you understand the many layers of your emotional world so you can respond to yourself with clarity and compassion.
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Yes — this is one of the reasons IFS is so powerful for daughters of immigrants. When you’re navigating multiple identities, it can feel like different parts of you want different things. IFS helps you understand where these parts come from — cultural values, family rules, survival patterns, or your own needs — and teaches you how to care for each part without judgment. It becomes much clearer to see what’s truly yours and what you’ve inherited.
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You’re not alone — most clients feel that way at first. We take it slowly and use metaphors that make sense to you, like a team, a roundtable, or a board you’re leading. Once you start identifying your parts with clarity, everything begins to click. Clients often say IFS becomes second nature — grounding, comforting, and surprisingly intuitive.
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IFS is the foundation of my work, but our sessions won’t rely on just one modality. I also integrate relational-cultural therapy, attachment theory, strengths-based work, and a culturally responsive lens so the work feels grounded, relational, and meaningful.
Alongside that, I’m trained in psychodynamic therapy and use evidence-based approaches like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Solution-Focused Therapy, and Motivational Interviewing when they’re helpful.
I choose what to use based on what you’re experiencing in the moment — not a rigid formula. The goal is to support you in a way that feels relevant, compassionate, culturally attuned, and genuinely useful. IFS is the through-line, but the work is always flexible, responsive, and tailored to you.